[This is where it gets a little tricky. How does one explain everything succinctly? She's good at writing reports and jotting down notes for herself, but to make someone else understand the gravity of it all - it's difficult, partially because she can't untangle her personal feelings from it, no matter how she tries.]
You know I'm a general. I used to be head of the police force, before my city-state instantiated martial law.
The escalation was, in part, a response to domestic terrorist attacks that were carried out by some of the very people who are now here. They've outright killed many, caused even more to die, and they are completely unrepentant.
But here - it's like none of that matters. Even the others here, who I thought were on my side, are urging me to just... agree to let these terrorists do whatever they want. They call it a treaty, but it's just a full pardon. We get nothing out of this.
I don't mean to burden you with my problems, but you're an unbiased party and your judgement in the tunnels was logical and sound. I'm... having difficulty stepping back to see the full picture.
[ that is a lot, it's a little more advanced than what he's used to— he comes from a company that she'd probably frown upon, her sense of justice reminds him of seonghae, her abiding by the rules of doing what's right meets agent choi.
... is he really the person she should look to? ]
It's not a problem at all. It's natural to have concerns.
[ he won't call them feelings, it might not be something she wants to hear. even though soleum doesn't show his emotions, he does take that into account that her difficulty comes from feelings even she doesn't understand. a character forced to stand by her role, unable to break through what defines her because this is safe, doing as she's always known.
he has a feeling she isn't searching for advice, and if she wanted it, she'd ask. besides, this is a sensitive situation that she probably wants him to understand. ]
I understand that you lose more than you gain, and no one wants to experience loss when they've put in so much effort. I can tell that you've gave too much to allow this, so I want to ask you what you'd want in return. What are your goals?
[That's an interesting question. She hasn't reflected much on goals, other than simple survival and trying to help others where she can. It's different from her goals back home, which were to apprehend Jinx through increasingly-alarming measures. She doesn't have that power here. If she did... she doesn't know that she'd take the same measures again.
So she thinks it plainly, before she can stop herself.]
I want her dead.
[There's something so clean about the purity of hatred. Cait has imagined it countless times. She remembers what Jinx looks like in the sights of her rifle, the clarity of the magnification scope between them, the way her finger brushed over the trigger. How it would feel to put a bullet in her skull.
[ he had a feeling, no, he knew she'd say something like that with her prior list: terrorism, the death of civilians, martial law and her intense feelings of sticking to the narrative. she feels so strongly that kim soleum feels that her concept is so deeply rooted she wouldn't let go.
if he did, what would she have left? he wouldn't ask her to change, the most he can do is navigate he'd thoughts from a third party, unbiased sense as that's what she wants. ]
I know you said "we", so I can only guess there is more than one person here who has been wronged by this individual? It's a difficult situation, Miss Indigo.
I won't lie to you. Since this may affect your decision, I will be upfront and tell you this: death that occurs here is able to be reversed.
[ he has learned that first hand, and with this knowledge, he hopes to navigate her anger. the desire she has to kill someone is a scary thought, that is a fear he carries, he doesn't want to be why she pulls the trigger. if he could have it his way, there'd be no gun, he'd find a way to resolve her situation. it's easy to act calm, present ideas for her to think about, and allow caitlyn the deciding factor, but that doesn't stop him from thinking it's way too much.
not just her, the fact there's also someone here who kills with ease and doesn't share the same sentiments that caitlyn has. ]
It's not my place to tell you whether your goal is right or wrong, but I can tell you this may not be the place to pursue it.
[ please, there has to be other ways!! please, don't make him responsible for someone's death! ]
[This is why she came to him. Soleum has seemed nothing but analytical and pragmatic in the tunnels, and Cait values that. He doesn't flinch away from her just stating it, though the idea is often buried in her heart. It's unpalatable. She wants things like justice and protecting others from further crimes - the concept of vengeance is an ugly thing, and one that she tries to be above.
But she knows. Deep in her heart, she knows the truth, and that is what she shared with him, in a strange moment of vulnerability.
He doesn't recoil or chastise her for it. It doesn't seem as if she's lost respect in his eyes: he just gives her the facts of the situation, valuable information that will further factor into her decision. She appreciates him even more for that.]
Jayce, yes. But he... he left before things got worse.
[So he doesn't know the full extent of it, is what she tells herself. He can't, or else he wouldn't be advocating for this.
Still, with Soleum's information, she can recalibrate - 'think out loud' as it were.]
If killing her is only temporary... and this place doesn't have enough structure or oversight to fund or staff a prison to keep her and her father in... I see.
[She imagines alternatives: finding some sort of space to hold them for as long as necessary, a hole to bury them both in and drop food and water down as necessary. It's brutal and a horrifying violation of human rights, and something in her gut twists at the thought of it, but if it means protecting others? It is an option, albeit one she'd rather not pursue. They would find a way out, she thinks - she knows better than to underestimate Jinx's resourcefulness.
Still, she says:]
There are ways to remove someone's capacity to be a threat without outright killing them.
[If unsupervised imprisonment fails, there might be a way to medically induce a coma. Barring that, surgical intervention. Neither are things she'd even allow herself to think in a message to him - has her hatred truly gone this far? - but it's something she has to consider as a drastic alternative.]
Please keep in mind that this conversation is purely hypothetical. Like I said, I need an unbiased perspective.
Do not worry, Miss Indigo. All I can offer are facts of the present scenario offered to me.
[ facts that are trying to steer that irritation and pain in a way that doesn't involve anyone getting hurt. soleum couldn't handle it, he couldn't do it, he's already taken part in harming someone that's part of his team. he only has so many people that he knows back home, and aren't these individuals who make them the strongest? even if there are one or two bad apples, aren't they still useful because they know what they're capable of? ]
It does sound ideal to limit them, but you know these individuals better than anyone else, I take it? What they can do, what they don't want. Hypothetically, you could sign the treaty and use the time it buys you to prepare collateral that ensures their cooperation.
[ it sounds like nonsense, it sounds difficult, but even kim soleum has a hand in this. baek saheon, the nastiest of characters he's witnessed, and soleum has the goat right underneath his finger if he rearranges his beliefs. as long as he's a sick psychopath that enjoys the pain of others, the employee will listen, he'll do anything to avoid that type of person soleum molded for him. ]
You are a sergeant, someone trusted to lead, and have tapped into the trust of those in the tunnels.
[ this is something to keep in mind, and he's sure her leadership will show through the veterans that exist here.
it's harder because those she disliked may have built great rapport with them, but what matters most is what caitlyn can do in the time that she has. ]
[That's an interesting maneuver. Cait considers it, thinks about what she already knows about Jinx and Silco, the things they care about. It's not a lot - Silco largely seems to care about Jinx, despite what she did, and Jinx cares about... Vi, maybe?
What would make them both stay in line? She can't threaten Jinx to keep Silco under wraps, but... she could use that reputation that Roe is referring to, can't she? If she can get enough of a standing here in Manhattan, she could threaten to isolate her, turn the city against her.
It has potential, and it's less macabre than severing tendons. And if Cait does that and Jinx reacts with violence, she would be well within her rights to remove the threat.]
...it's a possibility. I just don't know if I can come face to face with her and not -
[Just thinking about it is hard. Cait clenches her jaw, her face twisting into a grimace behind the delicate lace blindfold she uses to communicate.]
Yes. Tip the scales and let it go in your favor, make it so they're unable to resist.
[ it is a method out of his own bag, but he won't say how familiar he is with it. what he does have is that she knows her power, what people looked up to her, what they did to remain in good standing. if anything were to happen and a leader would need to be chosen, those from below would know their choice.
if word of her spreads, for the good, then anyone who defies her would have a tough time.
soleum knows the power he places in her head when he speaks of leverage, the things she can do once that power is hers. this is playing for the late-game, she'd have to work her way up and bide her time. they don't know how much time they have here, but it should be enough that in time maybe she'll find a better method to handle her situation.
he thinks there's progress, that it'll work. of course he'd think that until her final reply comes, and soleum closes his eyes.
...
where does this fall in the narrative of a character? is this why she strives for justice? ]
I'm sorry.
[ and he sounds genuine, because what else he can say? he doesn't know what it's like to lose his parents, he can't even recall them no matter how many times he tries. he only feels empty as he's unable to sympathize with this feeling. the most he can think is, why him, he shouldn't be the one to learn her story. nothing good ever comes from learning the reason of why they tick, their inner struggles, he tries to avoid it... and somehow he fails. ]
You must've been close with her. That gives you every reason to take this advantage; your mother wouldn't want you to put yourself in unnecessary danger.
[ by definition of a mother, isn't that their role? ]
This can't be about her mother - it's about safety and preserving the peace and punishing others justly for their crimes. It isn't about a white coffin or watching as her father retreats back into himself every night. It shouldn't be about any of that, and Cait tries to separate her personal grief with her duty to the people around her, but it's not always possible.
Shouldn't it motivate her? Everyone Jinx kills is someone's son, someone's daughter or sister or mother. Shouldn't the firsthand knowledge of how raw it feels to bury someone you love before their time give her the nerve she needs to see this through?
But it can't be about her at all. As soon as she starts making decisions like this for personal reasons, she loses her ability to be objective. She has to toe that line.]
You've given me a lot to consider.
[Playing the long game sounds infuriating, but it's better than playing her hand too early and ruining what reputation she's managed to build. It's better than burning her bridge with Jayce and making herself a target. Being patient is hard, but here in Manhattan... she has to work with the tools she has. That means rebuilding her reputation, assembling an arsenal, finding allies who would help her when push comes to shove.
She doesn't have to tell anyone. Not even Jayce. This can be between her and Roe Deer.]
I see the benefit of doing it your way. If I become some kind of vigilante, I'll just erode the trust that I've started to build. I care about these people, and taking matters into my own hands without state-sanctioned authorization just puts a target on my back.
I'd even lose Jayce.
[She would sacrifice that relationship if it was absolutely necessary, but even with that, there's no way to reach her ideal endgame while she's here. Not with what little power she has.]
I just can't abide by doing nothing. It's like I'm waiting for them to hurt someone. I hate gambling with people's lives like that.
[ that's the root, it has to be, and rather than picking it out... it spread underground, it ingrained itself into her, and what's hidden underneath the dirt that's her family she uses the beauty of justice to conceal the truth. her mother, she's mad at this extra character because of her mother, she never mentions her father but he can guess he's absent or something happened there too.
a cliche storyline that's used for certain characters to keep them going, but being strong and thoughtful of those that need to be protected is so much easier than being honest about what she couldn't protect. overcompensating maybe? whatever it is, he doesn't really need to know, he's not in the right mindset to handle this.
though, he got back who he lost compared to her who only has memories to soothe the pain. soleum closes his eyes, a small headache forms, and he thinks over the information. ]
You have the upper hand with the new arrivals. There's no need to become a vigilante or lose those that you know, you can be Miss Indigo—not with a target on your back—but with individuals who have your back.
[ it'll do the job, he thinks. that way she won't have to sit there simmering in her own frustrations as she waits. it's not just a waiting game with them, this is also a long-term goal for herself to ensure that she has people who will stand by her. hopefully this solves some problems, he has no true understanding of what she's going through or the people that's asking for a treat. there's someone named jayce who she speaks highly of, even mr. van hasn't returned in the conversation, so soleum files him underneath her concerns and more so... he's good at what he does. ]
In this hypothetical, it's not a gamble, because you'll be prepared for when they strike. When they do, and their actions aren't as desired, your word will be stronger than theirs. You will be active, busy, waiting and they won't know a thing, Miss Indigo.
[She's still not entirely convinced. Someone could end up hurt or dead because she didn't take earlier action... but if that does happen, then she'll have all the ammunition she needs to turn the others against Jinx and Silco. With that logic, she allows the people here to stay in danger by mingling with known murderers, but she does so with an intentionality that ultimately can protect more people once they're exposed.
It's a careful balancing act. She can see why Roe Deer was a bit hesitant to bring it up, but Cait can recognize that this method rocks the boat less while allowing her to be more respected in the community. She can wait for her time. She can allow Jinx to do whatever she wants and trust in her own strategy to eventually keep her in check.
In the meantime, she just has to play nice.
It won't be that hard. She genuinely likes a lot of the people here she's met, and her distaste can be compartmentalized as needed for their ultimate goal. And now Roe Deer knows the truth.]
Alright.
[These are all good points, particularly when considering that any authority she carries from home - whether from her name or her position - is gone now.]
I'll agree to the treaty.
If they come for me or anyone else here, I can respond in self-defense, but for the time being I'll accept the proposed peaceful and nonviolent solution.
This isn't my world. I don't have my resources or authority here to pursue them. With them at least pretending to agree to these terms, I can be patient and build leverage again.
he's exhaling a breath that he's been holding in this entire time, the concerns that flooded his mind are starting to disappear as well. for once, he's glad that not having a horse in this race was able to slow down her burning hatred. without the information to condemn them like she does, she may not be aware, but soleum has his own troublemaker to hold the leash of.
she won't be the only one having to play a role to keep issues from growing. ]
That's good.
[ he wants to thank god how good that is, now he doesn't feel the need to throw up if he hears about caitlyn having killed someone. of course, she probably doesn't want to do this, she's probably concerned that something will go wrong. those feelings are warranted considering who she's dealing with, and he doesn't want to brush that to the side. ]
We all do share a common goal, to return to our world. I'm well aware someone like you wants to help everyone here, so you do have that going for you by being an ally.
[ she may not have anything from back home, but she does have this. ]
The sooner you agree, the less they can comment on how unwilling you are. I'm wishing you luck on your endeavors.
[ should he pray for that treaty to go well? well... he will. ]
[It's logical, pragmatic. This is why she came to him after her experience working with him in the tunnels, and she's glad for it. If nothing else, her respect for Roe Deer has only grown throughout the context of this conversation, and she considers him a valuable ally - possibly her most valuable here so far.
Of course, she doesn't know how he really views her, the kind of person he really is. Still, it hardly matters in this moment when he's given her the path to a temporarily-peaceful resolution.]
Thank you. I owe you.
[For more than just letting her bounce ideas off of him without judgement - for possibly helping her to see a way through this without immediate bloodshed.]
Let me know if there's anything I can help you with. Now, or in the future. I'm here for you.
[ she's the one who needed this, she's the one who had issues with what those people she knew were giving her. part of him is happy with being able to offer some assistance. a helping hand though he didn't give much in terms of it, because all he gave was information she probably already knew.
caitlyn only had to make sense of it, accept it, and find how she could navigate such a risky play.
having more people that relies on her, and she, them, can go a long way.
the murmur should disconnect now that she's resolved, but it still remains, like soleum is holding up the line.
and he is. ]
There is something.
[ it's been on his mind, and if she's willing then... ]
[There's no question in her mind that she'd help him - even if he hadn't listened to her or refused to hear her out, Caitlyn still owes him from the tunnels. What's more than that, she just genuinely wants to help.]
If this burdens you, there's no need to pick up the offer. I only ask knowing you have a penchant for watching after others.
[ he feels almost bad for being so quick to take it when she gave him the chance, he should have held onto it when it mattered most. later, not when he's desperate and worried like this, especially when this ask is a little taller than it should be. ]
You're familiar with Agent Choi and Miss Dolphin, those two are individuals I share a world with outside of here. There's also a third, a goat, I'm unsure if you saw him with me. Brown hair, eyepatch, and looks like someone that would break off into a sprint if you scare him?
[ that character in question is none other than baek saheon, and soleum doesn't think adding him is the smartest choice. however, to get them home, he'll have to add that nuisance so he only prays that this doesn't cause caitlyn any problems. ]
These three, if you can spare them a glance from time to time. Just to make sure they're alright.
[ he doesn't want to say "watch them" or "protect them", but just a short look to ensure they're not in any trouble. it's all he asks. ]
[ honored? well, he didn't expect that. to be honest, he didn't do that much, and so he can't help but feel a little... off kilter? not being able to show that in his actions or words, he carries on. ]
He's a handful, but if he causes you any problems, please let me know.
[ as for living situation... ]
I've found a roomy place, suited for one, but I couldn't ask for anywhere better.
I'm alright. I found a decent spot and I can keep myself fed for awhile. Things are a bit odd with the treaty situation, but I know how to look after myself.
[Losing her mother and then having her father just detach himself in grief has at least given Caitlyn a crash course on self reliability.]
I've been... able to keep most of the changes so far hidden under my coat. But yes. My understanding is that there are those with physical changes, and those with new abilities. I seem to be the former.
[ truth be told... he shouldn't have asked. he feels a little squeamish, bothered by the concept, because he was told that onset symptoms start differently for people. to know that she has physical and visible changes, will he also have trouble looking at her, soon?
it wasn't long ago when she was human, just a human, unless something happened there that he didn't see.
soleum grimaces. ]
I see. I'd ask if you'd be willing to elaborate what kind, but that may be personal. So I'll ask something else like this: even with those changes, you haven't experienced any pain, correct?
[ how bad has that contamination set into her? ]
I'm sure the hospitals around have been raided, but it wouldn't hurt to double check in order to have some pain relievers with you.
It's alright. It's silly to keep it as some sort of secret, I just don't want strangers commenting on it.
[Though, would they? These transformations seem to be almost common knowledge now.]
I've been growing... feathers. Not many, just a few. They catch on things if I'm not wearing a jacket - that part of it gets painful. I tried to tear them out at first, and that was painful.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
[Gods help her, she just needs some girlies
gender neutral termto vent to.]There's some people here who you know from your home, right?
It's the same for me. But the people I know... it's complicated.
no subject
[ maybe it's easier to talk like this for her, even he doesn't know what expression he'd wear admitting something personal.
if cait thinks hard enough, soleum could be a cute girl. it's all about believing. ]
I see.
What type of rapport have you built with them? That way, I can understand your position.
no subject
You know I'm a general. I used to be head of the police force, before my city-state instantiated martial law.
The escalation was, in part, a response to domestic terrorist attacks that were carried out by some of the very people who are now here. They've outright killed many, caused even more to die, and they are completely unrepentant.
But here - it's like none of that matters. Even the others here, who I thought were on my side, are urging me to just... agree to let these terrorists do whatever they want. They call it a treaty, but it's just a full pardon. We get nothing out of this.
I don't mean to burden you with my problems, but you're an unbiased party and your judgement in the tunnels was logical and sound. I'm... having difficulty stepping back to see the full picture.
no subject
... is he really the person she should look to? ]
It's not a problem at all. It's natural to have concerns.
[ he won't call them feelings, it might not be something she wants to hear. even though soleum doesn't show his emotions, he does take that into account that her difficulty comes from feelings even she doesn't understand. a character forced to stand by her role, unable to break through what defines her because this is safe, doing as she's always known.
he has a feeling she isn't searching for advice, and if she wanted it, she'd ask. besides, this is a sensitive situation that she probably wants him to understand. ]
I understand that you lose more than you gain, and no one wants to experience loss when they've put in so much effort. I can tell that you've gave too much to allow this, so I want to ask you what you'd want in return. What are your goals?
no subject
So she thinks it plainly, before she can stop herself.]
I want her dead.
[There's something so clean about the purity of hatred. Cait has imagined it countless times. She remembers what Jinx looks like in the sights of her rifle, the clarity of the magnification scope between them, the way her finger brushed over the trigger. How it would feel to put a bullet in her skull.
Vi stopped her last time, but Vi isn't here now.]
no subject
if he did, what would she have left? he wouldn't ask her to change, the most he can do is navigate he'd thoughts from a third party, unbiased sense as that's what she wants. ]
I know you said "we", so I can only guess there is more than one person here who has been wronged by this individual?
It's a difficult situation, Miss Indigo.
I won't lie to you. Since this may affect your decision, I will be upfront and tell you this: death that occurs here is able to be reversed.
[ he has learned that first hand, and with this knowledge, he hopes to navigate her anger. the desire she has to kill someone is a scary thought, that is a fear he carries, he doesn't want to be why she pulls the trigger. if he could have it his way, there'd be no gun, he'd find a way to resolve her situation. it's easy to act calm, present ideas for her to think about, and allow caitlyn the deciding factor, but that doesn't stop him from thinking it's way too much.
not just her, the fact there's also someone here who kills with ease and doesn't share the same sentiments that caitlyn has. ]
It's not my place to tell you whether your goal is right or wrong, but I can tell you this may not be the place to pursue it.
[ please, there has to be other ways!! please, don't make him responsible for someone's death! ]
no subject
But she knows. Deep in her heart, she knows the truth, and that is what she shared with him, in a strange moment of vulnerability.
He doesn't recoil or chastise her for it. It doesn't seem as if she's lost respect in his eyes: he just gives her the facts of the situation, valuable information that will further factor into her decision. She appreciates him even more for that.]
Jayce, yes. But he... he left before things got worse.
[So he doesn't know the full extent of it, is what she tells herself. He can't, or else he wouldn't be advocating for this.
Still, with Soleum's information, she can recalibrate - 'think out loud' as it were.]
If killing her is only temporary... and this place doesn't have enough structure or oversight to fund or staff a prison to keep her and her father in... I see.
[She imagines alternatives: finding some sort of space to hold them for as long as necessary, a hole to bury them both in and drop food and water down as necessary. It's brutal and a horrifying violation of human rights, and something in her gut twists at the thought of it, but if it means protecting others? It is an option, albeit one she'd rather not pursue. They would find a way out, she thinks - she knows better than to underestimate Jinx's resourcefulness.
Still, she says:]
There are ways to remove someone's capacity to be a threat without outright killing them.
[If unsupervised imprisonment fails, there might be a way to medically induce a coma. Barring that, surgical intervention. Neither are things she'd even allow herself to think in a message to him - has her hatred truly gone this far? - but it's something she has to consider as a drastic alternative.]
Please keep in mind that this conversation is purely hypothetical. Like I said, I need an unbiased perspective.
no subject
[ facts that are trying to steer that irritation and pain in a way that doesn't involve anyone getting hurt. soleum couldn't handle it, he couldn't do it, he's already taken part in harming someone that's part of his team. he only has so many people that he knows back home, and aren't these individuals who make them the strongest? even if there are one or two bad apples, aren't they still useful because they know what they're capable of? ]
It does sound ideal to limit them, but you know these individuals better than anyone else, I take it?
What they can do, what they don't want.
Hypothetically, you could sign the treaty and use the time it buys you to prepare collateral that ensures their cooperation.
[ it sounds like nonsense, it sounds difficult, but even kim soleum has a hand in this. baek saheon, the nastiest of characters he's witnessed, and soleum has the goat right underneath his finger if he rearranges his beliefs. as long as he's a sick psychopath that enjoys the pain of others, the employee will listen, he'll do anything to avoid that type of person soleum molded for him. ]
You are a sergeant, someone trusted to lead, and have tapped into the trust of those in the tunnels.
[ this is something to keep in mind, and he's sure her leadership will show through the veterans that exist here.
it's harder because those she disliked may have built great rapport with them, but what matters most is what caitlyn can do in the time that she has. ]
no subject
[That's an interesting maneuver. Cait considers it, thinks about what she already knows about Jinx and Silco, the things they care about. It's not a lot - Silco largely seems to care about Jinx, despite what she did, and Jinx cares about... Vi, maybe?
What would make them both stay in line? She can't threaten Jinx to keep Silco under wraps, but... she could use that reputation that Roe is referring to, can't she? If she can get enough of a standing here in Manhattan, she could threaten to isolate her, turn the city against her.
It has potential, and it's less macabre than severing tendons. And if Cait does that and Jinx reacts with violence, she would be well within her rights to remove the threat.]
...it's a possibility. I just don't know if I can come face to face with her and not -
[Just thinking about it is hard. Cait clenches her jaw, her face twisting into a grimace behind the delicate lace blindfold she uses to communicate.]
She killed my mother, Roe.
no subject
Tip the scales and let it go in your favor, make it so they're unable to resist.
[ it is a method out of his own bag, but he won't say how familiar he is with it. what he does have is that she knows her power, what people looked up to her, what they did to remain in good standing. if anything were to happen and a leader would need to be chosen, those from below would know their choice.
if word of her spreads, for the good, then anyone who defies her would have a tough time.
soleum knows the power he places in her head when he speaks of leverage, the things she can do once that power is hers. this is playing for the late-game, she'd have to work her way up and bide her time. they don't know how much time they have here, but it should be enough that in time maybe she'll find a better method to handle her situation.
he thinks there's progress, that it'll work. of course he'd think that until her final reply comes, and soleum closes his eyes.
...
where does this fall in the narrative of a character? is this why she strives for justice? ]
I'm sorry.
[ and he sounds genuine, because what else he can say? he doesn't know what it's like to lose his parents, he can't even recall them no matter how many times he tries. he only feels empty as he's unable to sympathize with this feeling. the most he can think is, why him, he shouldn't be the one to learn her story. nothing good ever comes from learning the reason of why they tick, their inner struggles, he tries to avoid it... and somehow he fails. ]
You must've been close with her.
That gives you every reason to take this advantage; your mother wouldn't want you to put yourself in unnecessary danger.
[ by definition of a mother, isn't that their role? ]
no subject
This can't be about her mother - it's about safety and preserving the peace and punishing others justly for their crimes. It isn't about a white coffin or watching as her father retreats back into himself every night. It shouldn't be about any of that, and Cait tries to separate her personal grief with her duty to the people around her, but it's not always possible.
Shouldn't it motivate her? Everyone Jinx kills is someone's son, someone's daughter or sister or mother. Shouldn't the firsthand knowledge of how raw it feels to bury someone you love before their time give her the nerve she needs to see this through?
But it can't be about her at all. As soon as she starts making decisions like this for personal reasons, she loses her ability to be objective. She has to toe that line.]
You've given me a lot to consider.
[Playing the long game sounds infuriating, but it's better than playing her hand too early and ruining what reputation she's managed to build. It's better than burning her bridge with Jayce and making herself a target. Being patient is hard, but here in Manhattan... she has to work with the tools she has. That means rebuilding her reputation, assembling an arsenal, finding allies who would help her when push comes to shove.
She doesn't have to tell anyone. Not even Jayce. This can be between her and Roe Deer.]
I see the benefit of doing it your way. If I become some kind of vigilante, I'll just erode the trust that I've started to build. I care about these people, and taking matters into my own hands without state-sanctioned authorization just puts a target on my back.
I'd even lose Jayce.
[She would sacrifice that relationship if it was absolutely necessary, but even with that, there's no way to reach her ideal endgame while she's here. Not with what little power she has.]
I just can't abide by doing nothing. It's like I'm waiting for them to hurt someone. I hate gambling with people's lives like that.
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a cliche storyline that's used for certain characters to keep them going, but being strong and thoughtful of those that need to be protected is so much easier than being honest about what she couldn't protect. overcompensating maybe? whatever it is, he doesn't really need to know, he's not in the right mindset to handle this.
though, he got back who he lost compared to her who only has memories to soothe the pain. soleum closes his eyes, a small headache forms, and he thinks over the information. ]
You have the upper hand with the new arrivals.
There's no need to become a vigilante or lose those that you know, you can be Miss Indigo—not with a target on your back—but with individuals who have your back.
[ it'll do the job, he thinks. that way she won't have to sit there simmering in her own frustrations as she waits. it's not just a waiting game with them, this is also a long-term goal for herself to ensure that she has people who will stand by her. hopefully this solves some problems, he has no true understanding of what she's going through or the people that's asking for a treat. there's someone named jayce who she speaks highly of, even mr. van hasn't returned in the conversation, so soleum files him underneath her concerns and more so... he's good at what he does. ]
In this hypothetical, it's not a gamble, because you'll be prepared for when they strike.
When they do, and their actions aren't as desired, your word will be stronger than theirs.
You will be active, busy, waiting and they won't know a thing, Miss Indigo.
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It's a careful balancing act. She can see why Roe Deer was a bit hesitant to bring it up, but Cait can recognize that this method rocks the boat less while allowing her to be more respected in the community. She can wait for her time. She can allow Jinx to do whatever she wants and trust in her own strategy to eventually keep her in check.
In the meantime, she just has to play nice.
It won't be that hard. She genuinely likes a lot of the people here she's met, and her distaste can be compartmentalized as needed for their ultimate goal. And now Roe Deer knows the truth.]
Alright.
[These are all good points, particularly when considering that any authority she carries from home - whether from her name or her position - is gone now.]
I'll agree to the treaty.
If they come for me or anyone else here, I can respond in self-defense, but for the time being I'll accept the proposed peaceful and nonviolent solution.
This isn't my world. I don't have my resources or authority here to pursue them. With them at least pretending to agree to these terms, I can be patient and build leverage again.
[Good job Soleum, #nailedit]
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safe.
he's exhaling a breath that he's been holding in this entire time, the concerns that flooded his mind are starting to disappear as well. for once, he's glad that not having a horse in this race was able to slow down her burning hatred. without the information to condemn them like she does, she may not be aware, but soleum has his own troublemaker to hold the leash of.
she won't be the only one having to play a role to keep issues from growing. ]
That's good.
[ he wants to thank god how good that is, now he doesn't feel the need to throw up if he hears about caitlyn having killed someone. of course, she probably doesn't want to do this, she's probably concerned that something will go wrong. those feelings are warranted considering who she's dealing with, and he doesn't want to brush that to the side. ]
We all do share a common goal, to return to our world.
I'm well aware someone like you wants to help everyone here, so you do have that going for you by being an ally.
[ she may not have anything from back home, but she does have this. ]
The sooner you agree, the less they can comment on how unwilling you are.
I'm wishing you luck on your endeavors.
[ should he pray for that treaty to go well? well... he will. ]
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[It's logical, pragmatic. This is why she came to him after her experience working with him in the tunnels, and she's glad for it. If nothing else, her respect for Roe Deer has only grown throughout the context of this conversation, and she considers him a valuable ally - possibly her most valuable here so far.
Of course, she doesn't know how he really views her, the kind of person he really is. Still, it hardly matters in this moment when he's given her the path to a temporarily-peaceful resolution.]
Thank you. I owe you.
[For more than just letting her bounce ideas off of him without judgement - for possibly helping her to see a way through this without immediate bloodshed.]
Let me know if there's anything I can help you with. Now, or in the future. I'm here for you.
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[ she's the one who needed this, she's the one who had issues with what those people she knew were giving her. part of him is happy with being able to offer some assistance. a helping hand though he didn't give much in terms of it, because all he gave was information she probably already knew.
caitlyn only had to make sense of it, accept it, and find how she could navigate such a risky play.
having more people that relies on her, and she, them, can go a long way.
the murmur should disconnect now that she's resolved, but it still remains, like soleum is holding up the line.
and he is. ]
There is something.
[ it's been on his mind, and if she's willing then... ]
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[There's no question in her mind that she'd help him - even if he hadn't listened to her or refused to hear her out, Caitlyn still owes him from the tunnels. What's more than that, she just genuinely wants to help.]
What is it?
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I only ask knowing you have a penchant for watching after others.
[ he feels almost bad for being so quick to take it when she gave him the chance, he should have held onto it when it mattered most. later, not when he's desperate and worried like this, especially when this ask is a little taller than it should be. ]
You're familiar with Agent Choi and Miss Dolphin, those two are individuals I share a world with outside of here. There's also a third, a goat, I'm unsure if you saw him with me. Brown hair, eyepatch, and looks like someone that would break off into a sprint if you scare him?
[ that character in question is none other than baek saheon, and soleum doesn't think adding him is the smartest choice. however, to get them home, he'll have to add that nuisance so he only prays that this doesn't cause caitlyn any problems. ]
These three, if you can spare them a glance from time to time.
Just to make sure they're alright.
[ he doesn't want to say "watch them" or "protect them", but just a short look to ensure they're not in any trouble. it's all he asks. ]
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[And she means it too. She makes a note of all the requests, thinks back to her experiences with some of them in the tunnels.]
I don't recognize the, um, goat, but I'll look out for him as well.
Are you all settling in alright? Found a place to stay and some food to eat?
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He's a handful, but if he causes you any problems, please let me know.
[ as for living situation... ]
I've found a roomy place, suited for one, but I couldn't ask for anywhere better.
[ in the backseat of a cramped car. yeah. ]
What of you, is food no longer a concern anymore?
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[She... assumes he means like, an apartment.]
I'm alright. I found a decent spot and I can keep myself fed for awhile. Things are a bit odd with the treaty situation, but I know how to look after myself.
[Losing her mother and then having her father just detach himself in grief has at least given Caitlyn a crash course on self reliability.]
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[ whether the treaty means little or if she finds other ways to help take the treaty in stride. that's the position he's put himself in. ]
There's another question, excuse me if it seems to be too much.
[ a pause, and then he asks as gently as he can, his tone measured. ]
Have you noticed any changes in regards to yourself?
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[She goes a little quiet though, thoughtful.]
I've been... able to keep most of the changes so far hidden under my coat. But yes. My understanding is that there are those with physical changes, and those with new abilities. I seem to be the former.
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it wasn't long ago when she was human, just a human, unless something happened there that he didn't see.
soleum grimaces. ]
I see.
I'd ask if you'd be willing to elaborate what kind, but that may be personal.
So I'll ask something else like this: even with those changes, you haven't experienced any pain, correct?
[ how bad has that contamination set into her? ]
I'm sure the hospitals around have been raided, but it wouldn't hurt to double check in order to have some pain relievers with you.
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[Though, would they? These transformations seem to be almost common knowledge now.]
I've been growing... feathers. Not many, just a few. They catch on things if I'm not wearing a jacket - that part of it gets painful. I tried to tear them out at first, and that was painful.
Just having them isn't painful at all.
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